A Midweek Crisis … in which I am deeply disturbed.

A Midweek Crisis … in which I am deeply disturbed.

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DeeplyDisturbed

It has recently been drawn to my attention that there have been shenanigans going on within the massed ranks of The 1951 Club. Yes, shenanigans. I know. I can sense an almost audible gasp of shock amongst you. Perhaps you should sit down and have a brandy. Maybe two. A photograph has recently come into my possession. Let us call it … Exhibit One. 

The 1951 Club

As you can plainly see, it features those fine actors Helen Worth, Nigel Havers and Simon Rouse. It looks innocent enough, until I reveal to you mes amis that they were … ALL BORN IN 1951 and are therefore, by default, members of The 1951 Club. 

They are seen here apparently in rehearsals for an episode of Coronation Street. But appearances can be deceptive. For it was really a covert emergency meeting of the 1951 Club’s Manchester branch which I didn’t even know existed. How am I aware of this you may well ask. I shall tell you. I just happen to be quite well acquainted with one of the young ladies who works in Corrie’s make-up department. Her name is …. well let’s just call her Donald.

watkins

Watkins

She was able to get close enough to hear some of their conversation and this is the gist of the discussion …

Firstly, they want to replace Watkins, my ancient and loyal social events secretary, with a younger model. He is a very spritely 87 years old. Now, I am all in favour of younger models …

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But I really  have to draw the line when it comes to ever replacing Watkins. Over my dead body. Or his, if push comes to shove.

The 1951 Club_kindlephoto-85844170

Secondly, they want to move our regular social gatherings from the first Tuesday to the second Wednesday of each month. This would clash with my Bridge night. No way José. I mean, they’ve yet to turn up anyway.

And then finally, to cap it all, they want a bloody new clubhouse. What’s wrong with the one we’ve got, I might ask.

shed

A lick of paint here and there. A door. A tub of flowers and it will look perfect. New clubhouse. I don’t think so.

Watkins is understandably very upset by this sorry turn of events. In fact, I have had to lock him in the cellar for a few days until he calms down. Mrs Watkins is feeding him pate de foie gras and cider via a straw through the keyhole. I expect all will be well soon. Meanwhile, if you would like to send poor old Watkins a message of support, then by all means do so via the comments section. I daresay he’d appreciate a few kind words. 

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12 responses to “A Midweek Crisis … in which I am deeply disturbed.

  1. Haha brilliant. But a big BUT when locking someone away don’t keep feeding them it keeps the cost down😊

    • Yes. I see your point entirely. I really do. Mrs Watkins is bearing the expense. He’s a little bit more sound now so I’ll probably let him out in the morning.

  2. Chin up, Watkins! Smell the flowers, take a break and enjoy your pate! Things are afoot the likes of which I myself don’t even know about.

    This post is delightful! Delicious, droll, dry and very entertaining.It brought a smile to my face and a chuckle to my belly, just when I needed both. Keep up the good work!
    -matt

    • Watkins says hello. He seems much improved after his enforced (for his own good) solitude. Sometimes I wish my problems were as simple as the Greek economy. 😀🔧🐶😥

  3. Teehee I love this! What a vicious bunch the Manchester 1951 Club seem to be. That one in the middle is clearly ET in a wig. I’ve always had a soft spot for Nigel Havers, his behaviour disappoints me. Watkins must be saved at all costs!

    • Update: Watkins is out of the cellar and is a cheerful as a man who has been locked in a cellar (for his own good) can be. The keyhole diet had some unfortunate results.

      • Thanks for the update, I have been worried about Watkins. Sad to hear of the unfortunate results – I hope Mrs Watkins was able to clear them up. Watkins sounds like he might fit in well at Old College – I am sure we can find him a role if the deviant Manchester branch have their way.

      • Don’t worry about the Manchester branch. 1951 Club Inc. are ‘dealing with it’. I mentioned you to Watkins. It is so good to see an old man dancing with such reckless and wild abandon. Mrs Watkins is a bit jealous.She has gone out in a huff to purchase a bowler hat in order to jazz things up in the bedroom department.

      • HahahaHA! Watkins could be in for a treat, there. I can remcommend to Mrs Watkins some excellent hat suppliers, should she wish. Do let her know that the trick is to wear it at a jaunty angle. I wish you all the best with the Manchester lot – sneaky devils!

      • I will convey this information to her when she returns.🎷

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